the new year, always a good way to start... but for me, the year seems to be a tough thing to look forward to...

things happened... lots of them... my dad got punch in the face yesterday and we still could not find the guy... that fucker better don't let me see him... now his whole of his right face and eye swollen...

he also going to stop work at the coffee shop anymore... that means lesser income... actually that means no income... now its all up to me and my sister and my current "job" really pays too little...

its time like this that i think back... even though i told myself never to regret my action, as much as i enjoyed my life in the pass years.... its time to move on... time to stop running from the problems...

finally been through csb, not as hard as i imagine maybe its becoz i got my man around haha.

had my loneliest christmas this year... miss the celebration ytd... too tired haha plus the blister and abrasion...

as time goes by, i feel more and more like i am loosing touch with the outside world... there are to many movies i wanna watch, so many things i wanna do... but it seems like its harder and harder get ppl together...

it is time like this that i think back to poly life, working life... freedom... how i yearn for it to return to me and yet i know it would elude me for this 2 years in my life... lucky for me i have already been through more than half of it.

i kinda got used to it abit, but i know ultimately its not what i want... how i wish life would resume its normal flow... being able to control my schedule better and not having to worry about the random screw up that can happen... weekend[the very last of my freedom] being taken away...

okay i think i should be leaving this place by the 9th so i will be exploring this place abit more i guess haha.

today went all the way out to the main road[by walking...] but then quite cool sia saw alot of stuff.like the emu but then seriously shy animal man... when i am like a basketball court size away it already started running... so in the end i ran like mad but luckily able to get off with one picture of it at least haha... made it all worth it thought not a very close picture...

after that went to the kangeroo den... seriously alot of kangeroos over there just by the road side haha. even found 1 with a baby in the pouch haha looks really cute. took a picture with it too although its very shy and keep turning and therefore can only take a side view of it. but well good enough. saw even more kangeroos there.

after the kangeroo we went to the pond a very big pond haha.(okay not suspose to be there but i am there anyway haha) saw alot of birds but couldn't get close cause dun feel that its too safe haha. but then after awhile we saw them all flew away. the view was damn majestic man. hope u guys could be able to see as well. took a video of it luckily but miss a few of those birds cause i only saw it after awhile haha.

tml i guess i will try to wake up early to find snakes. dun wry its gonna be safe. haha will be seeing em from some distand. anyway found one run over snake in the morning as well haha. kinda coool and gross at the same time. got the picture down as well. so expects lots of photo haha got a few hundreds of them already =x

been here for a very very very long time already. now that the main task is done... i am merely waiting for RnR... but it sure is taking a long time haha. anyway saw alot of new stuff and lots of unique experience here. also try out some of the very expensive food at the canteen there haha. think i will try to make them when i reach back haha. lots of them are really good and i think its really not that hard to make. just that we do not have the culture and idea of it in singapore yet haha.

first time blogging on my phone... Should be quite expensive bah... Well dun really care. Need to get something out.
Really dunnoe what to do sometimes. People tend to think that others can read their mind. Others should do what they do. But then again did they ever though that every1 is different, no one can read mind.
Stuff like miscommunication can happen because of that. Alot can happen in fact. But they nvr tot of it as their fault.
Why can't ppl just be a little calmer. Sometimes things dun get solved by being rash.
Now i have ton of problem in my hand. Lots of stuff hiding in my heart... But some i really can't say... Others say already only create more trouble...
I really miss the days when life is abit happier, simpler and more enjoyable. Now i can only reflect on how much mistake i made and how useless i am...

been more then a month since i last blogged... nothing much to post.. nothing much i can post..

this is army..

things about myself? not much i can share on this free board...

kinda makes me think about the reason i started to blog? is it really a good idea to share stuff like what u do everyday with everyone?

there are so much that others are not suspose to know and cannot know as well.
so why do we blog? share about the happy stuff maybe?

guess thats why i haven been blogging then...

I never though i would do it but i did haha finish 21km!!!
so glad i did that as well... been doing nothing much these few days anyway... good to have some exercise...

days are getting boring too, not that previously was any better. i am still hanging on to the hope that life would get better so lets wait and see...

got tons of photo to take and upload as well but well camera not with me and my handphone is basically non-camera...

also today i realise that i cannot even operate a cyber shot phone haha... and neither can the owner lol... being in army too long just make us noob at all these equipment haha..

happiness, its a very simple word yet it mean so much... it been awhile now and i really feel like i no longer feel happiness... so how does it feel to be happy? what is happiness? why can't i be happy? the above mentioned sound so emo too...

but recently i really feel nothing but sadness and frustration... i feel so small and so helpless... because of that i think i have been desperately trying to do something... something to make me feel better... but what i did recently only seems to make myself feel worst... so what exactly should i do??

it just seems to get harder and harder for me... sometimes i truly feel like just taking a break and doing nothing... do some soul searching and try to find a solution if a solution does exist...

it seems just like yesterday that i am in poly and being the optimistic me... no worries or at least not showing any and always able to find a way around my problems... hanging around with my friends make me happy, playing simple games make me happy, just sitting in the lab doing programming and web design make me happy... and now?

it just doesn't seems so anymore...

seriously hope that this phase end asap.